The Not So Okay Valet

Well, I met some cool people yesterday. A fellow artist soon joined me at the 1st location. We waited on his valeted car that took about 30-45 mins. Why? The genius over the valet parking decides to have the guys park the cars in a lot 5 blocks away, the guy that got the ticket for my artistic associate explains to us while taking off on foot full speed. He looked like the old school cartoons where his waist down moves like a fan, his top half was sticking straight up, elbows bent, and head titled all the way back.

After the ride finally pulled up, we got in and went on our way. We look over to find out that next to the car (going the same speed as the car) is no other than the same valet guy on foot. He sees us…

He yells, “hey, wait!” We are slightly passing him when he adds on, “Can you give me ride!?!”

I’m already dead from laughter when my homie (one-half of a hip hop superteam) says, “go ahead and get in man.” (all disbelieving lower case)

Since we have not had time to get the music going, all we hear is the heaviest breathing a human can do in the back seat. He obviously is not a smoker because the lungs were crystal clear. I apologized to “the breather” for my Godly praises in between my shaking cries.

He said where to drop him off and all I heard was, “yeah, and I’m about to knock one of these motherfckrs out!” I crack my eyes open during the humor-initiated eye rain and look out the driver’s side. My homie says, “do you see that?”


mmm...damn...Andrew Howe

The valet is out the car leaping over parking dividers like it’s the 2012 Olympics. But this is NOT what he was asking if I am seeing! My friend was asking if I saw what he calls a swarm* of trannies. The valet guy was speaking of knocking out somebody in the swarm that he had to continuously go through to do his job. It was unbelievable! You would have thought it was a convention going on. Anyone that has seen a group of trannies would have known that this was obviously a bigger mass then ever seen before. All they needed was a dance routine and it would have been the most sassy, high-heeled Thriller rendition ever done.

So onto: The Full Circle Karma Key

*Swarm was decided upon after discussing the different terminology of a pack of wolves, murder of crows, flock of geese, and so on. It was the best fitting for what was seen at the moment.

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3 thoughts on “The Not So Okay Valet

  1. “*Swarm was decided upon after discussing the different terminology of a pack of wolves, murder of crows, flock of geese, and so on. It was the best fitting for what was seen at the moment.”

    LMAO!

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